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Posts Tagged ‘Disney’

Hannah Montana Movie

In Miley Cyrus on November 7, 2008 at 9:30 am

This could be the video version of Guns N’ Roses “Chinese Democracy.” Its release date keeps getting pushed back – not a good thing in the entertainment biz. Now scheduled for Easter, 2009.

Yawn – we all know the plot. Just like J.O.N.A.S.! The evil, sinister photographer takes racy pictures of the 15-years old girl ruining her Disney reputation. There’s a very incestuous one with daddy. Then, a gossip Web site catches daddy spoon feeding his precious daughter.

Then daddy divorces his wife, gets caught by the same gossip Web site rubbing suntan lotion all over his daughter’s buttock, then he takes up with a girlfriend who looks just like his daughter. Oops, that’s not in the movie. That’s Brooke Hogan. Sorry.

Disney, at least give us something – the soundtrack! Oh, not until Breakout is repackaged as “Platinum Edition” with two more songs (Someday and Hovering) and millions of mommies and daddies have to fork over another $15 for a second copy of Breakout. Who does Miley Cyrus think she is, Rihanna?

Want to hear the two new songs, go to YouTube. We’re in a depression, people. Why pay $15 for two songs? Be legitimate Disney, and give us the Hannah Montana movie soundtrack.

Who do you think you are, Microsoft – introducing new software every two years so they can sell more units for computer manufacturers? At least with computers, we can switch to Apple instead of buying new all the time. Disney has no competition in tween music. Warner Bros. or Sony have no concept of this genre.

J.O.N.A.S.!

In Jonas Brothers on November 2, 2008 at 12:50 pm

The new TV show featuring super stars (are they cousins?) The Jonas Brothers. Here’s what other Web sites say: The rock band Jonas Brothers have a secret. Their secret will be revealed soon….

We have the truth for you.

Jumping on themes developed with The Monkees, Spinal Tap, KISS’ Phantom of the Amusement Park, the key character here is Dr. Harvey Fleischman.

The evil, sinister Dr. Fleishman introduces the bros. to his sister, Heidi. She runs a business where Charlie Sheen is her biggest customers. She, too, is evil.

The first episode has the boys shaking Heidi’s hand and their purity rings melt and fall to the ground.

The boys end up purchasing the Playboy Mansion under Heidi Fleishman’s tutelage.

Scott Baio (Chachi from Happy Days) shows up at the nick of time to keep the boys from losing their virginity. Turns out he didn’t have far to travel since he’s always at Hef’s funland.

This televison show plot will provide a whole new take of the boys performing on “All Wrapped Up.”

Just heard the new CD. Aren’t these guys in or nearing their 20s? Why do they sound like 8-year olds? Grow some, boys! Thought I was listening to the Partridge Family or Cowsills.